We all have hopes and dreams — moments where we drift off and think about what the future would look like if we could just reach one of our goals. The strange thing is that, for most people, that's all they ever are: hopes and dreams. What would your future actually be like if you achieved them? You wouldn't be thinking about them any more — you'd be living them. So what's stopping you from going after them right now, and what barriers are really in your way?
The honest answer, more often than not, is: nothing. Nothing is stopping you. So read on, and let's look at how to make our hopes and dreams a reality, and how to change our outlook so we stop taking no for an answer.
The only real limitations in our lives are the ones we set and control ourselves. Other people can be negative and try to block us from our dreams, but only we control our own reactions and behaviour in response to them — and once we master that, very little can stop us. Once we discover our own self-worth, the next step is making our hopes and dreams a reality. Here's how.
Get rid of negativity
This might be a circumstance, an individual, a group of people, or even your location. If it's getting you down (making you anxious, depressed, low or exhausted), the first step is to get it out of your life. Not everyone can simply pack up and leave a home or a place straight away, but you can think it through, plan it, and then put that plan into place. We won't reach our full potential if something is constantly dragging us down or unsettling our balance, and we'll keep circling back to the same problem, time and time again, until we deal with the source of the negativity. A classic example is a partner (a husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend) who doesn't show faith in your potential, and is only too quick to remind you of your shortcomings or limiting factors. When that's the case, it's time to get rid of it.
I once walked away from a marriage because I knew my partner was never going to encourage me to reach my potential. It hurt, but I looked at it this way: to be happy, I needed to change what I was doing, change my surroundings and change my outlook, and for that to happen I had to walk away. Was it worth it? Yes — I'm more content, settled and happy now than I can recall being before. A little short-term pain, for long-term gain.
Set realistic goals
Write a list, in order of priority, of what you want to achieve — and make sure it's realistic. "I want to be a millionaire by the end of the year" isn't a realistic goal, even if you're playing the lottery. "I want to open a savings account and put 5% of my monthly income into it" is. Life isn't free, and nobody owes you a living. You're defined by the choices you make, so start making good ones and sticking to them. After a year of saving without touching the money, you'll likely look at that account and be pleasantly surprised by what you've built. If you can do it for one goal, there's no reason you can't do it for two or three — you might have to skip a few nights out or a bit of shopping along the way, but remember the end goal. Whether it's changing job, taking a trip, or finding a good partner, the methods for getting there are largely the same, so stick to it, and you give yourself a real shot at getting what you want.
Have confidence
You'll have doubts on some days, and you'll second-guess whether this is the right choice. That's normal. If you've already done the ecology check on your change (a way of thinking through its consequences before committing to it) then trust that work, and come back to it when doubt creeps in. Have the confidence that you can make it happen — don't waver or second-guess yourself once you've decided and started. Follow through, and keep going until the result is in sight. It tends to arrive quicker than you think.
Visualise it
Stop, close your eyes, and picture what you want right in front of you. Turn the colour up as bright as you can. Turn the volume up so you hear every sound, and notice every part of the picture in bold colour and sound. Hold it, and imagine you're right there, living it — smiling, most likely. Do that every day, and notice how good it makes you feel. If visualising it alone feels that good, imagine how the reality will feel.
Don't be afraid of failure
No one gets their dream right the first time, whatever anyone tells you. Failure will happen, and setbacks will occur. Don't get deflated or give up the first time you fail or hit a setback — get back up and get back on it. Drive, determination, focus, energy and diligence are what it takes to make hopes and dreams a reality, and everyone has them inside, even if it doesn't always feel that way. With the right guidance and direction, it's often easier than you think.
