So many people get to the end of their lives and are filled with regret: regret about the one that got away, regret about words spoken in anger, regret about missed opportunities, regret about actions that could have hurt someone. The list is endless. I want to show you and let you know that, when the time comes for you to shuffle off this mortal coil, regret is something you don’t want. So, let’s see how we can counteract it and live life to the full.
Enjoy the moment
Life is full of ups and downs, ins and outs, twists and turns. Life really is for living and enjoying the moments that will sculpt and define who you are. The past really is gone; it can’t be altered or changed, and the future hasn’t arrived. All we really have is the moment. If we spend our time worrying about things that have gone and things that haven’t arrived, we are not giving the present moment all our energy and focus.
Learn from the past
We all get it wrong. We all make mistakes. We all hurt people, albeit sometimes unintentionally. The trick here is to look at it, take what you need to grow from it and try not to make the same mistake again. Do it once and we can accept it; keep doing it and we need to ask whether we are learning from our mistakes or just repeating them time and time again.
Educate yourself on where you went wrong and why you went wrong. If you could do it again and have the right outcome, what would you have to change? That’s where the lesson lies in the past: it’s all about learning and then letting go.
Fail, and fail big
So many people are afraid of failure, but that can mean you are looking at it the wrong way. Many successful businesses and people have failed time after time and kept going. While we are at it, I don’t even like the word “fail”; I prefer to call it a hard learning opportunity.
You see, every hard learning opportunity can give you a million hints and tips on how not to succeed, how not to conduct yourself and how not to behave in relationships. So, don’t be afraid of failure. It is all part of this crazy journey we call life.
Trust your gut instincts
Your intuition can be a useful source of guidance. Whereas rational decisions come from thinking things through, your gut is that instinctive part of you that can be worth paying attention to. It won’t always get it right, so consider it alongside the facts. When we use logic as our only thinking mode, we may miss opportunities that our gut could have led us to.
Practise kindness
Intentional kindness is life-giving. It works wonders in putting people at ease and improving relationships. A smile or kind gesture can make someone’s day brighter. Being kind is an easy practice that enhances our own lives and the lives of others, whether we know them or not.
Give every day your everything
So many people ask me how we managed to take our practice from a thought to a busy hypnotherapy and coaching practice in Central Scotland, with clients all over the world. How did we come to travel to New York, Dublin and Florence to see clients and work with large-scale corporate companies and businesses?
You really want to know the secret? Okay, here goes. Wake up and run at the day and its opportunities with every ounce of drive and determination you have. That’s it. That really is it. We just give every day everything we have and follow up on every opportunity that presents itself, no matter how big or small.
We just want to make a difference each and every day. As one person, I may not change the world, but I will change the world for one person each and every day I am on this planet. So, the message really is simple: give it everything, every day, and don’t stop until you have what you set out to get.
Love, laugh and cry
Come on, get out there. Get your heart broken. Learn to recover, learn to accept, learn to cope. Learn that crying is okay, learn that laughter has its place too, and learn that this is life. It may not always be what we want it to be, but we can work towards living it with fewer regrets and enjoying the time we are blessed to have on this planet.
Reach for the stars, and you might just be surprised at how close you can get if you reach out properly and accept the pitfalls along the way.
And finally
Don’t hold on to anger or hate. These things can do more damage to the person carrying them than to the person they are intended for. Hate is a heavy load to carry. I am not saying go out and be friends with everyone who hurt you along the way, but I am saying that forgiveness can help you move forward. Forgiveness does not have to mean reconnecting with them.
I forgive each and every person who has hurt me in the past. I look on them with sorrow and hope they grow and develop, as I have. I hope they read blogs like this and have a reality check. I hope they also forgive me if I ever hurt them. For me, forgiveness really is a key component of living without regret.
