What this article covers
- Why it's worth questioning the idea that it's ok to be not ok
- An alternative way of thinking about it
- Why knowledge alone isn't power, but action is
Words are powerful. They can help, enhance, raise up and direct a person's mindset towards limitless opportunities and actions. They can also hurt, damage and derail a person just as quickly. Physical pain comes and goes, but emotional pain can last a lifetime.
So many people say "it's ok to be not ok" — you'll see the phrase every hour on social media, on Facebook and Instagram alike. As much as this might upset some people to hear, the truth is that telling someone it's permanently ok to be anxious, or permanently depressed, or in any other kind of ongoing emotional imbalance, can do more harm than good.
Think about it this way: we tend to believe what we tell ourselves and what we're told, on every level. So when someone hears "it's ok not to be ok," they may accept that as true and stay in that place for even longer than they otherwise would — because now they have the justification to stay there, and nobody can push them or try to direct them towards something better. Would it not be better if we said this instead?
It's not ok to be not ok, so let's do something to make you ok.
We're defined by our choices and actions, and change can happen in an instant. It's the going over something again and again that takes days, weeks, months, or even years. So why spend all that time before changing, when you could change now and go into the world tackling what's in front of you, focused and strong?
So many people say knowledge is power. It isn't, really — knowledge is information, and information alone doesn't make us strong. What does is action. Take that knowledge and turn it into an action, and that becomes power.
How many times have you told yourself you'll be happy once you've achieved A, B or C, or once you have X, Y or Z in your life? The question is: once you have it, who actually makes you happy? The plain answer is you. So instead of waiting for X, Y and Z, why not make the change now, and take on that activity or period of time in the state you said you'd give yourself once you got what you wanted?
It's the same principle with "it's ok to not be ok" — we just change the timeline on the misery, anxiety, worry, stress and fear. Instead of encouraging people to stay in that place by justifying it, let's do it differently: it's not ok to be not ok, so let's do something to make you ok.
Knowledge plus action creates power.
What will you do today to create that change? Will you turn your knowledge into action, or wait a while longer before realising that's what you needed to do all along?
Mullins Therapy is a multi-award winning relationship and anxiety practice with offices in Central Scotland and Dubai, UAE.
